As a transformational life coach, one of the most powerful tools I can offer my clients is the ability to see beyond their defining moments. It’s a common human experience to allow the hardest thing we’ve been through to become the lens through which we view ourselves and the world. But we are so much more than the thing that hurt us most in life. We all have a unique set of skills, strengths, and values that make us who we are, and that is not limited because of the adversities and hardships we’ve faced.
For quite some time now, I’ve been channeling my expertise and energy on this subject into working with women without children. After spending years allowing my own infertility journey to define me, I sought a way to help childless women stop blaming their circumstances for the lack of progress or success in their lives. I didn’t want them to believe that if they didn’t have to deal with infertility, they’d be further along.
The truth is, our circumstances are not always the cause of our struggles. My life was stuck not because of infertility, but because of my own limiting beliefs and fears. And this goes for everyone from all walks of life who hasn’t developed the positive intelligence and bandwidth to see beyond their defining moments. We all need to face hard things to move forward with our lives, no matter the circumstance.
And so, I had an epiphany.
I will never deny my passion for helping women dealing with infertility navigate the emotional and mental challenges of the journey. I know how isolating it can be. But the more I worked with women in this community, the more I realized my approach was inadvertently contributing to the idea that women who don’t have children are different and separate from those who do.
Our defining moments do not make up who we are as individuals, and infertility is just one part of my story. This inner dialogue made me question if I was limiting myself to working only with women who shared this experience.
The decision to shift my coaching business to serve all women was not easy. It required me to step outside my comfort zone and rethink my approach to coaching. But by expanding my focus to all women, I hope to bridge the gap between communities and bring us all together. Women face a multitude of challenges in their lives, whether it’s infertility, career changes, relationship struggles, body and health issues, or other trauma. By recognizing and supporting each other’s struggles, we can create a stronger sense of community and connection.
I do not want to perpetuate the idea that infertility defines women. My goal as a coach is to empower women to take charge of their lives, achieve their goals, and embrace self-acceptance instead of seeking approval from others instead of living the life they want. I want to help women build the confidence and resilience they need to overcome any challenge. Expanding in this way will award me the opportunity to make a greater impact.
While I work on the release of a new program that combines multiple methodologies I’ve used over the years with clients, I’m reflecting on what I hope to bring to a wider community of women and what I hope to contribute.
Above all, I hope to cultivate a space where women can embrace their complexity. We have so many pieces that fit to make the entirety of the puzzle that is us. We need them all to make it complete. When we allow one experience or circumstance to define us, we limit ourselves and our potential. But if we identify life’s roadblocks to boost a breakthrough moment, we can see beyond that one piece that just doesn’t seem to fit right now.
I don’t want anyone to see themselves as weak, broken, or flawed when, in reality, they’re so much more than that. By acknowledging our strengths and values, we can move forward to create a more fulfilling life.
I also hope I can continue to help women learn from their challenges, whatever that may be. Every difficult situation we face has the potential to teach us something profound about ourselves and the world around us. By reflecting on our experiences and identifying the lessons, we can grow and become a better version of ourselves.
I am hopeful this new journey will allow me to show more women they don’t need to pigeonhole themselves based on their toughest moments or the limiting beliefs they have. I want to foster resilience, perseverance, and the importance of self-care and self-reflection. It’s pivotal for me to help women move to a space of compassion and confidence instead of feeling like they have to settle for a life that doesn’t ever feel like enough.
With this shift, my clients are going to keep creating and taking action instead of waiting on the sidelines, but for me, they’ll be less of a separation between communities. Now, I can bring everyone together to learn from each other’s challenges, offering unique perspectives and insight that can create a collective sense of meaning and purpose in our lives.
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